Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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