If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

whats 2+2? 4

No your aunties a joke

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

Knock, knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who?

Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

the only thing i learned in geometry is when you push two circles together it makes a titty venn diagram

My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

Whats the difference between a black man and a picnic table? Alot of things

Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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