XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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Why did'nt the puppy eat it's food? Because it was made up of little bits and peices of it's family.

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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What did the book say to it's reader? What are you stupid? People who read can't hear!

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What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

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What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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an emo girl walked into a white room

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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