Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Potassium? K.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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69.

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

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Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

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What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops