One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

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what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

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-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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Do you want to hear a joke? No.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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A raptor and a Tyrannosaurus Rex walk into a bar. Everyone runs for their lives as the dinosaurs ate everyone who was too slow.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

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Sarah Palin.

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops