Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

Why does a squirrel have the tail at the back? Because at the front it's the squirrel.

What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? He got hit by a bus. Why did the bus crash? It hit a boy eating an ice cream cone.

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

knock knock... ...no answer

Knock knock knock OCD

An indian boy asked his Dad,'Why do we have such long names?' His father didn't reply, he died on the road home.

Who has no penis Religious Believers

i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Roses are brown Violets are brown What the hell who keeps shitting in my garden

Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

Knock Knock Who's There Nobody Nobody Who?

Yo mama's so stupid, she put the baby in the microwave

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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