What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

A man was walking down the sidewalk. Then he turned into a drugstore.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

Q. Which one do you hate more? Jews, Mexicans, or Asians. A. I hate all of them, but jews are annoying when they resist getting stuffed in the oven.

Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

knock knock whos there I AM YOUR MOTHER!!!!

A blind man walks into a bar. I mean a fence.

Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

They say duck tape can fix every thing, Not my grandma's cancer for that matter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...