Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Turns out he was needed immediately at a business meeting.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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What did the Jewish girl do when I asked for her number? Roll up her sleeve...

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

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Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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every knight i see an owl at window

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yo Dawg I heard you like dogs... So I sent yo ass to prison and got an NFL contract

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops