Why did a guy with a lisp, v-neck, and piercings pee while sitting down? His joints hurt.

Once upon a time, a princess was hungry. and there was a frog wearing a tux for some reason.so the princess ate him. THE END.

What did the man with leprosy say to the prostitute? Keep the tip

Why are african american people better than caucasian people at sports like basketball? Because african american people have more high-twitch muscle fibers. Which allow them to perform Explosion type movements better than caucasian people.

why did the man die? he got shot

What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

GUY 1: Mann, I just got done working out, check out my forearms!!! GUY 2: You only have two silly!!

Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

whats funny and has four wheels? A handicapped 11 year old boy getting raped by his father

Why was the monkey on the floor? Because it was dead.

If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

I met a man today. His name was John.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? - Getting raped by an giant scorpion.

Your mum is so fat, she has a larger bmi than someone with a healthy bmi

What do you call an anti joke website? http://anti-joke.com

How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Lilys are from england violets from japan. I've got a knife now get in the van

What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

I hate you.

What did the dog do when it raised its leg? It peed.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

Why was the blonde woman crying? -because she witnessed her infant get sucked into a jet engine and was very sad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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