A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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What do Whitney Houston and MTV have in common? They both REALLY died in the 90's.

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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Q.) What do you call a black man on the moon? A.) An astronaut.

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Oooh. That fish smells delicious.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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My name's Forrest Gump. People call me Forrest Gump.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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Why is Michael Jackson bad at chess ? Because he is dead.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

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A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

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Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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Someone dies every second. That's 60 a minute. 3600 a hour. 86,400 a day. 604,800 a week. 31,536,000 a year. But thankfully- I don't live in Zimbabwe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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