what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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so a unicorn walks into a bar... and then i woke up

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Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

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what's the difference between your grandmother and a dead squirrel? Technically, if you burn them both, your grandmother will produce more ash, but apart from that, they are both useless pieces of carbon.

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How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

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A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

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Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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Why should you be scared when a black man asks you, "What are looking at?" Because if he is over the age of 18, he should know better than to end a sentence with a preposition, unless of course, he never had an education, in which case... you should probably run for your life.

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what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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What's sad about 4 black people in a cadillac going over a cliff? It was my cadillac

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops