Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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Knock knock! Just kidding.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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A black man and a Mexican were in a car. Who was driving? The cop.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops