Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

A duck walks into a convient store and ask the cashier, "You got any bread?". The cashier immediatley responds, "No sorry, we don't sell bread." The next day the duck comes back and asks the same cashier, "You got any bread?" The cashier sighs and responds, "No, we still have no bread." After browsing for about three minutes the duck comes back and asks, "You have any bread?" The cashier, as pissed off as a beached whale, says, "NO! WE WILL NEVER GET ANY FRICKEN BREAD AND IF YOU ASK AGAIN I'LL NAIL YOUR BEAK TO THIS COUNTER!" The duck sways his head and looks to the ground, only to look right back at the cashier and ask, "You got any nails." The cashier says, "No." The duck comes back and says, "You got any bread?"

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, your parents are dead they never loved you! I found this one on facebook and i just found this site and all yall got some good jokes LOL

getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had celebral palsy.

Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

why did the elephant fall out of the tree? it was hit by a fridge. why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was sellotaped to the elephant.

Apple hates Blackberry.

How many nipples are on a raccoon ? I don't raccoono

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

Why do people go on this site? They have no friends and no lives.

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None they would just beat the room for being black.

How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

What is a black person's favorite color? There are many different colors and it would be unrealistic to believe that all the people of a single race would choose the same one as their favorite.

what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...