What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q:Why did the Grape divorce the Prune? A:Because he was tired of Rasin kids! :D

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If Alex Maitland reads this he is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The chickens have become self-aware!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the black kid down the road get for Christmas? Your Bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops