What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

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What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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How do you make a clown frown Throw an axe at his face.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

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Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Q; Whats the hardest part about nailing a dead baby to a wall? A; my dick while doing it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

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Boy: Your father must be an alien, because there’s nothing else like you on earth! Girl: *whispering* please don't tell anyone we are trying not to be noticed...

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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A neutron walks into a bar. The barman says, "for you, no charge." The neutron replies, "very funny asshole, you're just going to put it on my tab after I pass out."

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A man did not like this site

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Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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