Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

the WNBA.

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

Why did the old man die? He was old.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

whats orange and cant talk? an orange

What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...