How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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Hitler: honey what's for dinner? Hitlers wife: a jewwwsyy steak

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Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

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What's worse than a completely overused anti-joke punchline? The Holocaust.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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How do you beat a black in sports. "shot him when the game starts"

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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