Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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Why do people where saggy pants that don't fit? They can't afford too buy new

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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men's rights activists

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

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What happens when you run over a black man? It is most likely that he is killed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This website is dumb Your mom is going to kill you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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