How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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Shltskc gw? G

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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Penis

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't care I have AIDS

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

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A Black Man Walks Into an Office For A Job Interview. The Meeting Goes Very And He Soon Has A Very Nice Steady Job.

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

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A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops