Peter was sitting on a bench. He had a bag of 10 sweets and was eating them slowly. John and Anthony both wanted some, but Peter wanted to still have sweets left over. How many did he give them both? None. He's that selfish.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the stock market crashed 600 points today, and his retirement account took a hit. He can't afford his car anymore.

Why was the interracial marriage unsuccessful? Because several social factors have challenged the couple as they live in a rural part of the South and interracial couples generally aren't as accepted in those areas as in progressive city centers.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

what's worse then the holocaust finding a worm in your apple.

What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

Roses are nice, violets are fine, ill be the 6, if you be the 9!

Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

What do you call a man with a horse? A man

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

Why did the german killed the jew? Because he was nazi.

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

Why couldn't the mexican make a taco? He died.

Knock knock Come in

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

What do you call a lion eating a gazelle? the food chain.

why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

what happened when the boy jumped? he landed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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