How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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Grandpa loved a good joke, he died laughing. The doctor said it was a severe stroke probably brought on by smoking aggravated by high cholesterol and high blood pressure.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Ring Ring! Hello? Hello, is your refrigerator running? Yes it is Good.

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winnig the lottery twice.

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What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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I like food. But what's more than that it is necessary for survival. ASIAN!!!!

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

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How do you spot a paedophile in a playground? You don't, there are usually a lot of adults around.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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