Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapeled to the chicken

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dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

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What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

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I like my coffee like i like my women ... With big titys

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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What did Reed read? A. Read?

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The grass is always greener on the other side.

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Im taking a shit right now.

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What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

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My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

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What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

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you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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