Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

what do you call a fish with no gills? I dont know what youd call that creature...but its no fish.

A penguin walks into a bar and orders a beer................ PENGUINS DON'T WALK OR TALK

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

What did the first muffin say to the second? Nothing. Muffins can't talk, you idiot.

If life hands you lemons Take them

Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

Exactly what?

How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

A gorilla walks into the DMV to apply for a drivers license. Turns out it was just some guy in a gorilla suit doing a prank. Everybody instantly realized this at the time since gorillas aren't indigenous to the local area. They guy responsible was charged with a small fine for public mischief.

An English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man walk into a bar. I observed this from outside and therefore have no idea as to any of the sequence of events that occurred once they had entered the bar and disappeared from my line of sight.

How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

A man, a woman and their child wen to a restaurant. There was a horse in it and they left. The Holocaust begun

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Roses are red Roses are red What is big Cherenets head

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they are not, they are purple. Whoever the uneducated idiot was who made up that poem deserves nothing more then a slap in the face

q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

Men's rights

Why did the woman die Because she was old

square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...