What do you call a video game nerd who insists on sitting at home all day not going out or thinking of others except for beating the level or killing the creature or leveling that skill or completely ignoring his civic duties? Accepted

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So, this one time, I was at the grocery store. Man, that was nuts.

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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Want to hear a joke? Womens rights

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Why arnt black people alowed in bars? Because monkeys don't drink beer! DER DA DER.

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did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

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a drunk man got 3 beers and a 5 whiskys

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If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

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Whats worse then nailing ten babies to a tree? Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was staples to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure

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a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face" the horse says "my son was just diagnosed with multiple sclerosis"

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A little gir gets stung by a bee. Her parents see the bump She now geting meletedin Rehab because her parents saw her shoot up heroine.

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what makes white men feel embarrassed and and ashamed? when they find out their girllfriend has been sleeping with a black man.

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What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

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Hello world

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In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

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why do firemen wear red suspenders. I dont know because they go with there hat.

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Why was the black man happy? He got a raise.

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What's grosser than gross? Grosser. What's grosser than that? Grossest.

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around? A kitten in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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