When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

Every 60 seconds in Africa. A minute passes.

Knock, knock Who's there? Die bitch

Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

A person walks into a store. He goes to a worker an asks "were is the potatos?" . The worker says, there on that shelf.

What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

There once was a man from Peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe he woke with a fright, in the middle of the night and then went back to sleep

you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Shes dead.

Black people are innocent.

What's funny? Women's rights.

A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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