Knock, knock. Who's there? Joseph Kony. Give me your children.

Why is the sky red in London? Fire.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

how do u unload the dishwasher? u take the dishes out!

Jess Burns

How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

How do you keep a woman entertained? A delightful romantic comedy

A Mexican and a black person both jump off a bridge, who hits the water first? Neither, as all matter falls at the same rate, regardless of weight, size, or ethnicity.

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says, "Why the long face?" and the horse says, "I have cancer."

There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

Why Because

69

Where must you go if you have the desire to eat somebody's face? A psychiatric ward. You are clearly going insane and must seek help.

What's worse than losing your job? Getting brutally sodimized and murdered by a serial rapist.

Knock knock! Who's there? Fed-Ex. We have a package for you.

Knock Knock Who's There Ur Mom Ur Mom Who Ur Mom is Dead

Why was the child in the clown's car? Because the clown was a serial killer and abducted the child while he was at soccer practice, the child then raped and murdered

What is the difference between a Mac user and a PC user? The operating system that they prefer to use.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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