How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

I love you very much.

Math problem: You have 50 candy bars and decide to eat 45. What do you have now? Diabetes.

Q: What do you call a unicorn on a mountain? A: Freaking sick.

What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

What's red and silly? A blood clot

Why couldn't Jimmy ride a bike Jimmy is a goldfish

Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

What happened when a gay man asked a straight man what time it was? He told him the correct time, they parted ways and went about with their lives.

Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

So I went to the airport the other day, and the new TSA regulations are very strict.

I once bought a pack of batteries but they weren't included.

Robin, get into the Batmobile.

Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other-side

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

What did the college kids drink at the party? Soda. Alcohol is illegal for people under the age of 21 to consume.

Q: What do cooks do for a living? A: Eh muffin.

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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