What did the little boy say when he was sick? Nothing. He stayed in bed and slept all day.

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how did the bling man cross the street? He didn't half way there he tripped and got ran over by a car.

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What time is it? 12:19. weren't we supposed to leave like 5 minutes ago? 4. For the mall...

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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Oh...okay, good.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One, it's just a lightbulb

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Why do giraffes have long necks? Evolution.

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How do you know that a woman is having an orgasm? They go like OH YAH OH YAH:D

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

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Why did Justin Bieber smile in his mug shot? He did not understand the consequences of his horrible actions that could have killed many innocent men, woman, or children and, in jail, there could be very dangerous people living there.

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Why'd the girl commit suicide? Because Justin Bieber admitted he was gay.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms.

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Why did the man break into the bank? Because he was a bank robber

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he's dead

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

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A horse walks into a bar. He ordered some fries.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To murder your whole family.

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I got shot, you laughed

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what did the 0 say to the 8 nice belt

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Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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