"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

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What do you call a woman on a bike? A dike

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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I met her back in the 80s when she was a man.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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why did the black man cross the road? to get away from the racists

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

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teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

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Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

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What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

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Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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How do you make a little girl cry?

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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