You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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Q:How do you kill an Elephant? A:With an Elephant gun Q:How do you kill a blue Elephant? A:With a blue Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a purple Elephant? A:With a purple Elephant gun. Q:How do you kill a red Elephant? A:There is no such thing.

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what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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Whats worse then hell? The guy who commited suicide would know.

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Whats sorer than stubbing your toe? Stubbing your toe twice

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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silver bullet?

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

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Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

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Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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A: How do you piss off a female pilot? Q: Kill her family

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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A man walked into my repair shop asking why his TV didn't work. I told him it was broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops