Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

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Whats green and smells like bacon................. Green bacon

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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hes climbing in your window, hes snatching your people up. Hes a fireman.

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A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

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roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

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roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

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Why does Shelby Like Pandora? Because she prefers rap and hip hop music and Pandora helps select songs for her to listen to according to her interests.

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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