What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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What looks like midnight and is addicted to shemale porn? Xavier Jordan! Courtesy of Mrs. Maxwells 7th period

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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What is better than a Beer? Two Beers.

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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How does an electrician install an outlet? I don't know. I'm not an electrician.t

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* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops