Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

knock knock who's there? faith

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...