Why did the kid fail the test? Because he was retarded.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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look at there!! an entire dog!!

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What do apples taste like? Apples.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs wearing lead weights in a pool? Screwed.

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What's the difference between medicine and astronomy ? They're different fields of studies.

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does this look unsure to you?

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Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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Why wasn't Pat able to get an erection? Because Pat is a girl.

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What did the dog say when his family's grandmother came back to life from the dead and ate everyone? Nothing. This is a highly improbable situation, and furthermore, dogs cannot speak.

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How much does a polar bear weigh?. . .Approximately 515 kilos.

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What is the difference between a man and a woman? Genitals

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penis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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i like potatoes

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William Raines.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because Bob's a fish.

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Q: What did the hobo get for Christmas? A: Hypothermia.

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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The chicken crossed the road.

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What did the vegetarian eat for christmas? Food.

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A little gir gets stung by a bee. Her parents see the bump She now geting meletedin Rehab because her parents saw her shoot up heroine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops