What blue and red? poop in a saggy bag

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What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

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What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

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What's a Mexican who walks down the street called? A pedestrian.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a mammal.

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What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

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>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

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Why did the old man fart?? Because he had gas

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knock knock whos there .. derp

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How do you drown a blonde? Hold her head under water.

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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A dwarf walks under a bar.

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What is shorter than a toddler? A jewish lifespan.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

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How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your doorstep? A: Whatever his name is.

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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q. whats worse than finding your girlfriend cheating on you a. the holocaust

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What is the difference between jam and jelly? Jam has chunks of fruit, jelly does not.

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What do you expect from a perverted demon? -nothing less perverted!

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When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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