So Lindsay Lohan walks into a jewelry store. She buys a $2,500 necklace and goes on her way.

Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

Why did Tina's parents stop calling her? Because they died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

kennah campion... being nice

What do apples taste like? Apples.

How do porcupines have sex? The male begins by urinating all over the female. He then enters her from behind and proceeds to thrust until the act is completed.

Why did the cat cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

My dad beats my mom At checkers

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? Mentally confused.

A priest, a Rabi, and a Monk walk out of the bar and go home.

What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

Q: what happens to the black guy that walks into the bar. A: He walk in ,gets a drink, and leaves

what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

French people.

Why is little Susie crying? Her entire family is dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

Three kids were waiting in line at a camp. One said how long is the wait. The other two said i hope its long. They were waiting in line for the gas chambers at auchwitz

Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it was born yesterday.

Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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