Me: so Megan did it hurt Megan fox: did what hurt? Me: when ur aged face wasn't good enough for the new transformers movie?

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

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Yo mamma is so hairy that she had to shave

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i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

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Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

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A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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What happened when the tree fell It killed someone

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nathan palmer has a big head !

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why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

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A bear walks into a bar. There were 4 fatalities and 3 were taken to the hospital.

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what is white and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? a refrigerator.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

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What Do You Call A Japanese Man Humming Classicle Music While Removing Toy Soldiors From His Ear With His Foot Jumping Up And Down On A Large Elephant Strutting About The Universe? Strange.

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Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

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What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

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i am an idiot if you read this outloud your a dumb ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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