What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? If you need an electrician to screw in a lightbulb, you're a moron.

STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

So what happened after 911?? What do you think?

Why was the man afraid of the cat? Because he is allergic to cats and might die if he gets too close to it.

Why did Hitler cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways. Only after practicing proper safety procedure did he venture across the busy thoroughfare to retrieve his asthma medication from his car.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side why didnt the chicken cross back? for the first time in his life, Clucky the chicken, felt liberated. his cruel life flashed before his eyes, forcing him to remember all the bad tines he had spent on the McKinley farm. all the eggs stolen from him, watching all his friends being taken for slaughter. it all came back. from the other side of the road, Clucky saw a place he never wanted to go back to, a place he wanted to forget. the day he chose not to cross back was the first real day in Clucky's life.

Q. Why does Hugo masturbate? A. To build muscle.

What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

Q: Why did the boy cry? A: He was denied access into heaven

What do you get when you put a dead baby and some nails in a blender? A dead baby and some nails

A businessman walks out of a store with his new haircut he was bald.

knock knock you may come in

Aodhan Hearty

9/11 isn't funny. 19 Muslims died that day.

What do you call a man who just died 5 minutes ago? Dead.

What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

Ruller

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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