What's big and messy? A big mess

What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

Why did the pig jump over the farmer? Because he's a stupid idiot.

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

Your mom is so stupid... She was unable to go to college and therefore was not able to find a good job.

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

Whats black and gay? Obama

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Why was the chocolate black? It's not black you idiot, its white

Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

Why did the chicken cross the road Why? Because his house was burning down on the other side

Why did the little boy drop his ice-cream? He was run over by a bus and died instantly.

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

What's just not right? Left

How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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