How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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A black man and a muslim enter a bar. The Black man pulls out a gun in an attempt to commit a robbery, however the muslim opened his jacket, screamed "Allah Akkbar" and blew himself up. Everyone died.

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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school homewrok

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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what happens if you toss a grey stone into a red sea? it gets wet...

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

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Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

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roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

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How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

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Q: What goes up but doesn't come down? A: Columbia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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