Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

Why was the chicken angry? Because he was tired of everyone questioning his motives.

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

Yes

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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