all these jokes are horrible now

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Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

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Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

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What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

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Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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