What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

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why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

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Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

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Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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