Roses are red, Violets are blue, Wanna buy some meth.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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A duck walks into a bar, guess what the bartender does............ GIVES HIM A SEAT AND 6 FREE SHOTS! But instead of that the bartender promptly escort the duck out considering the fact that in all bars there is a no animal and/or pet policy so the duck went... and commitid a series of loud noises before he got to a hotel and hung itself, that is what any depressed hungover duck would do.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Red." "Red who?" "Red any good books lately?" Suddenly, the séance lost credibility.

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Why did the man say "huh?" Because he didn't hear what they said.

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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Why did the girl miss her date? She got killed.

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Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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