What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

knock knock Goodbye

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse stares eats an apple and trots out... Horses can't speak therefore do not understand the question and cannot reply

A man is walking on the beach and discovers a lamp in the sand. He takes it home to polish it. Eventually it looks like new and he gets a fairly reasonable price from an antique shop.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

You- I came up with a new word! Friend- What is it? You- Plagiarism.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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