What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

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What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

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Text this number just cuz 16305208722

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Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

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a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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