What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

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how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

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yo mamas so ugly she is often made fun of andridiculed about her appearance.

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What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

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what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

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is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops