What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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I farted and it smells like rotten ham with melted cottage cheese now dislike this please.

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Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

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Wanna here a joke? To bad you can't your black.

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The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

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Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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Do you like fishsticks? Ya, me too.

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

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Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

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what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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