- Anti Joke

Q:What type of cheese isn't yours? A:NACHO CHEESE!!!!!!!!!

Knock, Knock. Who's There? To get to the other side.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

What is the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? One is food the other, fuel.

Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

What's the problem with blonde people? They don't have black hair.

You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

What do you call a Black Comedian? Funny, You Racist.

How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

Knock Knock Who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave's crying because his grandmother has alltimers and now can't remember his name

A black guy walks up to a drug dealer. He asked the drug dealer for directions and went on with his life.

A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

What do you call a contraption made of a wooden rod attached to three strings attached to three rocks? A completely useless and pointless invention.

Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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