What did the little girl get for christmas? her first period

why do elephants have such flat feet.....? from all those damn trees they have been juming out of....

Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

A dwarf walks under a bar.

Three black guys walk into a gym and play a rigorous game of basketball for an hour

I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

thomas hall= fuckin dikc

What's worst than losing a million dollars? Losing a plane. Whats worst than losing a plane? losing 239 people, a plane and a million dollars

roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Dana Cohen not having herpes.

What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

A person with OCD walked into a abr.

Q: What did the man say to the sexy female nurse with long hair and big breasts? A: I have diarrhea.

Fat chickens enjoy stepping on doorknobs.

penis

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

Like Harry Potter? Like anti-jokes? Check these out: http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38139-why-did-dumbledore-fall-off-the-astronomy-tower-because-snape-killed-him http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38140-knock-knock-who-s-there-you-know-you-know-who-call-him-voldemort-fear-of-a-name-increases-fear-of-the http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/recent/38141-a-black-kid-an-asian-kid-and-a-jewish-kid-walk-into-a-barrier-they-are-students-at-hogwarts-school

What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

Why are haikus dumb Because they are just stupid Get it a haiku It is a haiku hashaha

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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