Why did the man burp? Because gases escaped from his stomach and came out of his mouth.

A: What is worse than a melted chocolate bar. B: An eaten one.

Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

"I see" said the blind man to his dead wife

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

Why was Six afraid of Seven? Six hasn't been the same since Vientnamn

A baby seal walks in to a club

why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

What did the baby said to her mother? Nothing because she aborted him

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

I used to love Christmas Until Santa woke me up and told me my dad didn't exist....

husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hodor

What do you get when you give a homeless man a sandwich? It thrown at the back of your head.

How did sally fall off the swings? she had no arms. Knock knock, who is there? Not sally.

What do you call a man with no legs? A paraplegic.

What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

why was little tommy thirsty? because he had juvenile diobetese

Me: Tell me I'm a fairy. You: You're a fairy. Me: Poof! You're a bag of shit!

Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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